This was recently brought to my attention. I was on the phone with a major computer
manufacturer about an item I ordered that was delivered to me defective. Talking to the customer service representative
I could hear an accent in his voice. Of
course he could hear an accent in mine, considering the fact I live in the
Southern U.S. where accents and dialects are as numerous as ants at a Sunday
picnic. That's for another blog, though.
To make sure that he understood me correctly he repeated
back to me every letter in my name and email address. In doing this he used the
"standard" word-for-a-letter format.
For example, for M he repeated, "M as in Mike?" Now, this intrigues me because my name is Mark,
why did I have to be called Mike? That's
another blog to write, too. He proceeded
to say, "A as in Alfa, R as in Romeo, K as Kilo." I said all of this was correct. When he came to my middle name which begins
with "W" he said, "W as in whiskey."
Now, let me stop here because the word for "W" is
whiskey, every time. This has been a
standard in use since the late 1950's.
"W" for whiskey. Now,
this really means nothing in the big picture called life but my life always
comes into view when I hear "W" for whiskey. My middle name begins with "W"
(just in case you weren't following along) and it is the name given to me by my
father to honor his brother. Here's some
quick family history on my part. My
father grew up in an era of hard and poor living in the South during the 20's
and 30's. It was a rough time for him
and his family. He quit school in the
7th grade to go to work eventually overcoming several obstacles to make a good
living in hotel management before dying at the age of 46.
Here's where the "W" for whiskey gets me every
time. My dad was an alcoholic. I'm not talking about the nice, sweet, kindly
fumbling and bumbling drunks we laugh at on TV sitcoms of the past. I'm thinking Otis from The Andy Griffith Show
here. My dad was what you might call a
mean drunk. He drank whiskey and drank
it hard. For a time he lived hard. There was a struggle with relationships, job
commitments, and he had health problems.
Before he quit drinking two years before his death, which might have been the best two years of his life, he had lived a life where
alcohol undermined his worth, value, and the lives of those around him.
As a child growing up witnessing all of this; seeing the
anger, hearing the angry slurs and profanity it became apparent to me that every
time the sales person says "W" for whiskey I'm reminded in that
moment, in that brief moment, that I come from a family where whiskey was not a
"stand-in" for the letter, W.
W for whiskey. Why
not "W for walking or whimsical or worship? Some will say, "Mark, you think too
much." That's probably true.
What else is true is that what I experienced in my childhood
has helped me to become the person I am; far from perfect. I've had my own share of pain and struggle
and mistakes. All of this has given to
me a more empathetic sense of those around me.
Many of us struggle with identity issues, past pain, future anxiety, etc. The thing about it all is that we don't have
to be defined by it. That "W"
for whiskey is my past bumping up against my future. The "present" of my life reminds me
that I am not my father. Still, I sense his influence in my life in ways that reveal to me the good and sometimes the not so good. The paradox of living is that each of us is made up of the raw materials given to us by our parents. It is our task to make something valuable of it all.
I am a man seeking to live my life in the best way that I
know. I seek to be a good husband,
father, grandfather, brother, and friend.
Sometimes the past knocks on the door and tries to tell me to give up;
that the future isn't any better. And I say
let the past lie; I won't stay there any longer.
W for whiskey?
Really?
How about W for Worthy?
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